Where Did the Joy Go?

And why does corporate life seem so good at taking it away?

A recent conversation with a client in a large FTSE100 business reminded me of something I've been noticing in my coaching work. Most of the leaders I work with are brilliant people – thoughtful, driven, genuinely committed to doing good work. But there's something else that keeps surfacing in our sessions.

They're all searching for the same thing: more joy.

Not happiness exactly, but that deeper sense of satisfaction that comes from work that feels meaningful. The kind of energy you get when you're doing something that actually matters to you.

Additionally, what I find fascinating (and a bit heartbreaking) is the generational divide in how people approach this search.

When I work with Millennials and Gen Z leaders, in the main they're actively designing their careers around purpose. They'll ask straight up: "Will this role bring meaning? Does it align with who I want to be?" It's not that they don't care about success – they just define it differently.

But my own generation – the supposedly pragmatic Gen X crowd – we seem to have convinced ourselves we don't deserve to ask those questions. We've spent decades chasing the "sensible" path: financial security, recognition, the approval of people whose opinions we're not even sure we value.

I know this because I lived it for nearly 30 years.

The relentless pursuit of something I thought I wanted – status, safety, the next promotion. But it wasn't making me happy. Worse, I wasn't even sure it was making me effective.

Now, I work for myself; with people I genuinely want to help. I make time for what matters – family, friends, long bike rides. And what does that look like? Well - this photo shows it. It’s of me and my great friend, Gareth, in the last stretch of three days cycling 367km of the gravel tracks, sandy paths, and byways of Norfolk.

The look on my face is joy.

I'm not pretending it's simple. Building this business is hard work, and I'm still figuring it out as I go (although, I think it's working out). But I have clients who challenge me, partners who inspire me, and the growing sense that I'm making a real difference – one conversation at a time.

What happens when you stop asking permission to want something better?

If you're tired of carrying the weight without feeling the satisfaction, if you're curious about what great leadership could feel like when it's aligned with who you actually are – let's talk.