When the Person Everyone Turns to Has Nowhere to Turn
We're in November, and you're probably looking back at your year – thinking about the one ahead.
I know I was this time last year.
I'd spent another 12 months holding things together for the team, providing the air cover, and being uncertain about my own future. And I was exhausted.
Many people reach this point towards the end of another calendar year. The John Lewis Christmas ad hits (honestly, I'm a soppy father – this year’s had me in bits) and the reflective questions start creeping in:
How's 2025 actually gone?
What does next year look like – honestly?
Is this where I still want to be in 12 months?
For me last year the answers were: not great, very unsure, absolutely not.
The strange thing about being a leader is that your job is to help others get clarity - cut through complexity, see the strategic picture, create the plan.
But when it comes to your own next step? That's different territory entirely.
Three questions to ask yourself
I work with a lot of people on career transition now. Not because I have some magic framework (I don't), but because I've been exactly where they are. I’m here today, doing the work I love, because of a great coach.
I’d have got here eventually, but she helped me face into the right questions when all I had was a statement – “I can’t do this anymore”. Ask yourself:
What do you want to be known for?
What has always brought you joy?
What kind of life do you want?
Simple questions. Devastatingly hard to answer honestly when you are locked into action, delivery, team leader mode.
There are loads of other questions beneath those three, but they are a great start. Can you answer them for yourself?
The relief of having someone in your corner
I had a great coach in mine. She helped me build the space and resilience back to make a choice that I haven’t regretted for one minute in 2025.
If you're feeling this – that tension between what your role requires and what you actually value, that isolation of being the go-to person with nowhere to go yourself – this might be the moment to find someone who can walk alongside you.
Not someone who'll give you a framework or tell you what to do. Someone who'll help you face the right questions whilst you figure out what's next.
A different kind of conversation
I specialise in working with senior leaders navigating exactly this space. The messy bit between knowing something needs to change and knowing what that change actually looks like.
If that resonates, let's talk. No pressure, no pitch. Just a proper conversation about where you are and what support might help.
I've been there. And I feel you.
